No one reads anything I write on Saturday.
Statistically, about half as much as every other day of the week.
And I understand why.
It’s Saturday and you have lives and family and friends or are scrambling to get everything done you don’t have time to do during the work and school week.
But I have a sickness. And I’ve become addicted to writing and posting daily.
So, I write, even though no one cares.
The Fringe Readers
But maybe there are some of you. Some of you, like me. In life transition. Being a little reclusive. And maybe you do care.
Maybe you do think: What ever could that whiny dude be up to today?
And maybe you peek in. And maybe you’d be sad if there wasn’t something new here.
A wannabe writer can dream.
I looked at some old Saturday posts and the traffic numbers for them.
And it turns out, some of my favorite posts are some of my least-read posts because I chose to publish them on Saturday.
“But Matt! You’re publishing THIS on Saturday! No one’s going to read this either!”
I know! I make bad decisions! It’s liberating! I can sort of do whatever I want! Type whatever I want!
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
And it won’t really matter.
I kind of like it.
Posts I Like That Were Ignored Because of Saturday
When you get divorced in Ohio, they make you go to a mandatory parenting class. This post has started to pick up some traffic lately because it’s ranking No. 3 on Google for “Karl Malone Divorce Video.” True story.
This is one of my all-time favorites. A man rearranged his day to help a stranger at the expense of his own time and money. And he credits things he read here. That made me feel exceptionally good.
I’m not a genius. But I’m kind of awesome at a handful of things. Want a few tips to make your life better? Sure you do. They live here.
Learn how a huge, hairy, glistening scrotum can create an entire world of possibilities. You won’t need your thinking cap for this one. Just a gargantuan Roman helmet.
In the most immature and profane way possible, I explore to what extent profanity in my writing benefits or detracts from its quality. You should only read this if you’re not my mom or grandma.
There’s a possibility I will still be alive on Saturdays in the future. In the event I am, I’ll probably want to publish things here.
In the interest of entertaining myself, I may use Saturday posts as my experimental laboratory.
Maybe I’ll draw crude pictures in Microsoft Paint.
Maybe I’ll write terrible poetry.
Maybe I’ll take a crack at writing fiction for the first time in my life.
Or maybe, just maybe, there will come a Saturday where I don’t post at all!
Maybe because I’m day-drinking and having the time of my life.
Maybe because I’m traveling and immersed in excitement and adventure.
Maybe because I’ll find a bedroom partner and refuse to leave that room.
Unless I croak first… see you next Saturday.